Like many people, 37-year-old Jonathan Sanchez thought the pandemic would be a few weeks maybe even a month of readjustment. And like so many others, it wasnt until it started dragging on and on that the Omaha, Nebraskabased financial advisor began to feel the effects of uncertainty and anxiety.
Then his wife got COVID-19 and he had to switch gears into being a solo caregiver for son Theo, age 7, and daughter Alexis, age 5. Just as he began to adjust, he got furloughed.
In a situation like that, where you dont know when things will end whether my wife will get better, whether my job will come back, how bad the virus will get its really tough, he says. Its depressing. I tried to stay busy, but theres only so many chores you can do every day.
On top of all that, he was hearing from relatives and friends in California about attacks on Asian Americans. Whenever he had to go downtown or shopping, he started to feel unsafe, to the point that hed constantly be making sure he knew where the exits were in case he had to run.
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As Asian Americans, were worried for people we love, and also for our kids and ourselves; its a terrible feeling, he says. So, I made sure to communicate with my wife about how I was feeling about all of this, and we started talking to a counselor together.
An outcome of those sessions was learning effective ways to give and receive love from one another, and that felt like a turning point for Sanchez. They made simple changes like using more words of affirmation and were more aware about supporting one another, he adds.
That was probably the biggest thing I learned this past year: how to ask for help, he says. Not even in huge ways, either. For example, I try to get my daughter ready in the morning, but Im terrible at pigtails. So, I ask my wife to do them. Even something that small makes us feel like were working together as a team, its a little win. And when you have those little wins all day, they add up.
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What Self-Care Has Looked Like for 3 Dads During the Pandemic - Everyday Health
